One of the biggest challenges I’ve faced in life is deciding whether I’d go for a traditional marriage or work on marrying someone I’m dating. I say “working on” because we all know that getting a guy you’re dating to commit is like getting a peach tree to produce bananas.
Women who are already married (under both circumstances) say that it’s all the same; they’ve all been shocked one way or another by their husband’s lifestyle, whether it’s the way he treats the help or the fact that he leaves his dirty underwear on the floor. While I cringe at the thought of both being a reality, I always feel like sticky situations would be easier to rectify if you actually know the guy. How do you tell a guy you barely know to chew with his mouth closed? Do conversations ever feel forced? How do you sleep with him?
A friend of mine got traditionally married recently (seriously, you girls need to stop doing that. I’m getting more pressure now.), and throughout the duration of her honeymoon, she would text me saying that she feels like she made a big mistake saying “yes”. He snored all night and didn’t like to do a lot of the things she wanted to. Eventually, they worked it out and she is happy with him.
On the other hand, the friend who married her long-term boyfriend knew exactly what she was getting into. She was excited to be a part of his family and travel with her man and start a family of their own, and because of all the time they spent together before marriage, communication was natural. Till this day, they act like best friends and are totally happy.
Ladies, dating in Kuwait is tough. So tough, in fact, that we go into relationships thinking of long-term goals because we can’t believe we found someone decent enough to be with. Sometimes it works in our favor, and sometimes it doesn’t. But with an arranged proposal, the man already has his eyes on the prize and is ready to commit to you.
So in cases where you’re ultimately going to be happy in the end, which route do you choose? A gamble for a fairy-tale romance that may or may not work out? Or a husband that you may or may not love?
I would love to hear your thoughts and experiences on love before/after marriage, especially if you’re a guy!